Where the fuck did I go wrong?

little background about me. I’m 23. Graduated college last year. Work my balls off. Make fantastic money. Just bought my dream car. Really genuine and good guy. I wake up go to work and come home and saw my girlfriend and went to the gym. Went on dates. Got her nice things. She’s still in college so not a lot of money considering what I do she lives a pretty awesome life for being in college. I’m making 100k+ right now so we live a pretty fucking good life considering our age and situation. I’m going back to school for my nurse anesthetist license here in a year or so. I’m not some fuck around loser. I’m successful and strive to be better and a solid man.

She ends up fucking some 21 year old ghetto fuck college kid. I worked my ass off for the last 3 years for this girl. I really did love her and cared for her. I never thought I’d want a family and kids but she changed that in me. I really enjoyed every moment. I was just happy.

I bought a absolutely gorgeous rose gold 2.5 karat diamond ring and plane tickets to Hawaii with helicopter rides and everything for New Years as a congrats for graduating.

our relationship wasn’t perfect. But we were happy and best friends. We did everything together. But I don’t understand how the fuck you can Throw away years of your life with someone who was supporting you through EVERYTHING.

I’m genuinely so mad at the world. Everything I have been working towards this last year was just thrown in my face and I feel like a dumb fuck. I can’t focus on anything and don’t give a fuck about anything. I’ve suffered from depression my entire life and she helped me alot through it all. Even when I had no direction. I just don’t understand. I’m not sure what to do. Everything I’ve been doing I just hate now. No focus what so ever…
You're going to hate the answer but the solution is where it's always been: in your head. She didn't get you to the top of your academic or professional life at such a young age - you did. Simply duplicate the feelings you had for her - which contributed as a motiving factor- with another object. Only this time, you'll know real happiness is from within.
 
Next relationship I get in, I ain’t spending much money if at all on em. They gonna work for it.

Somehow these days when you spend money on a chick they see it as a weakness rather than a gesture

the worse I treat this girl the more willing she is. The nicer I am to her the more she pulls away. And I’m a generous person.
I just don't get it why some women prefer their men to be assholes...that goes against the grain of who i am...
 
Stop assuming you did anything wrong. Do not let the actions of others sway you from a path that lets you sleep at night. Changing who you are for someone else’s actions is a losing game. Have integrity and stand up for yourself, but don’t go changing what makes you, you, because some college age chick fucked with you.
 
little background about me. I’m 23. Graduated college last year. Work my balls off. Make fantastic money. Just bought my dream car. Really genuine and good guy. I wake up go to work and come home and saw my girlfriend and went to the gym. Went on dates. Got her nice things. She’s still in college so not a lot of money considering what I do she lives a pretty awesome life for being in college. I’m making 100k+ right now so we live a pretty fucking good life considering our age and situation. I’m going back to school for my nurse anesthetist license here in a year or so. I’m not some fuck around loser. I’m successful and strive to be better and a solid man.

She ends up fucking some 21 year old ghetto fuck college kid. I worked my ass off for the last 3 years for this girl. I really did love her and cared for her. I never thought I’d want a family and kids but she changed that in me. I really enjoyed every moment. I was just happy.

I bought a absolutely gorgeous rose gold 2.5 karat diamond ring and plane tickets to Hawaii with helicopter rides and everything for New Years as a congrats for graduating.

our relationship wasn’t perfect. But we were happy and best friends. We did everything together. But I don’t understand how the fuck you can Throw away years of your life with someone who was supporting you through EVERYTHING.

I’m genuinely so mad at the world. Everything I have been working towards this last year was just thrown in my face and I feel like a dumb fuck. I can’t focus on anything and don’t give a fuck about anything. I’ve suffered from depression my entire life and she helped me alot through it all. Even when I had no direction. I just don’t understand. I’m not sure what to do. Everything I’ve been doing I just hate now. No focus what so ever…
What makes you think you did anything wrong? You just don't understand how females are wired.

Why is she living "an awesome life for being in college" on your dime? "We live a pretty fucking good life considering our age and situation?"

Dude, she was not your wife. it was not your job to provide her a good or awesome life, and there was no we. You are the only one who thought there was a we.

Forget about her. Next time don't give your all to some girl who has not given you her all.

Now forget about that cheating slut and focus on getting your nurse anesthetist license.

Don't go all in on a female in the future until she has shown she is all in for you, and even then dip your toes in slowly, not all at once. Learn from experience.

As for the ghetto kid, bad boys turn girls on. It is not acceptable to say it out loud, but females are wired that way, and they do not even know why or understand it themselves. "Really good and genuine guy" is not exciting or mysterious for a woman, and does not scream dominance of the world around that good and genuine guy.

Don't be the nice guy. Don't support some girl through EVERYTHING (your words, all caps yours, too) when it is not your obligation. As you saw with ghetto boy, that is not what does it for her. Ghetto boy did not support her. Ghetto boy is just exciting and dominant.

Be exciting and dominant.

Fawning over a woman and buying her expensive shit is not establishing dominance or exciting. It puts her in the dominant position, with you groveling at her feet and existing for her, up on her pedestal, where she is yawning and bored. Don't do that anymore.

A woman should not be getting any financial support from you unless she is either (a) your wife, or (b) your sugar baby, and if she is (b) then do not marry her.

Any questions?
 
Where did you go wrong?

Easy. You are asking what did you do wrong and the answer is nothing.

When someone shows themselves to be untrustworthy, it does not reflect upon anyone other than the person that betrayed the trust. Sounds like you are an awesome person. As a Dad with daughters in your age range you sound exactly like the type of person I hope they all meet. Continue to work on yourself and not allow people of a lower quality than you are to lower your own standards.

When you realize someone is not good enough for you it only shows how far you have come. You have self respect and are a good person that is building success and that success is growing. These are the years the people of the lowest values in your life will fall away as you rise above. Congrats on growing.
 
I'm sure there's lots of good advice in here. But I'll answer your question.
You went wrong when you started to give a fuck about a bitch.
Humans are fucking weird man, it's fine to care for common man, but personal attachment to another being is tough for me.
 
What´s done is done, the most important thing now is NOT TO ALLOW HER COME BACK TO YOUR LIFE, IF YOU DO, IT´LL RUIN YOUR LIFE.

Cut off permanently my man. She lost you FOREVER.

Forgiveness is for yourself, you don´t need to forgive people.

Next time don´t be so nice to girls.

As @malfeasance , there is no "we", we born alone, we die alone, everything else is an illusion, never take it for granted, enjoy it when you have it, but acknowledge that you can lose it all at any moment, and be in peace with this. You are whole and complete all by yourself.
 
Every girl I dated said I was really sweet and nice, but I also know how to be suave and not shower with attention so early on. Anyone buying into the whole niceguy bad boy dichotomy is low key laughable tbh. I’d refuse to get with any bitch that absolutely needed an “alpha male” “bad boy” and wouldn’t let me be a soft guy
Then get used to coming home and seeing her with some backyard bro’s, all taking turns nailing her on the giant trampoline that was purchased for the kids to play on
 
What makes you think you did anything wrong? You just don't understand how females are wired.
Why is she living "an awesome life for being in college" on your dime? "We live a pretty fucking good life considering our age and situation?"

Dude, she was not your wife. it was not your job to provide her a good or awesome life, and there was no we. You are the only one who thought there was a we.

Forget about her. Next time don't give your all to some girl who has not given you her all.

Now forget about that cheating slut and focus on getting your nurse anesthetist license.

Don't go all in on a female in the future until she has shown she is all in for you, and even then dip your toes in slowly, not all at once. Learn from experience.

As for the ghetto kid, bad boys turn girls on. It is not acceptable to say it out loud, but females are wired that way, and they do not even know why or understand it themselves. "Really good and genuine guy" is not exciting or mysterious for a woman, and does not scream dominance of the world around that good and genuine guy.

Don't be the nice guy. Don't support some girl through EVERYTHING (your words, all caps yours, too) when it is not your obligation. As you saw with ghetto boy, that is not what does it for her. Ghetto boy did not support her. Ghetto boy is just exciting and dominant.

Be exciting and dominant.

Fawning over a woman and buying her expensive shit is not establishing dominance or exciting. It puts her in the dominant position, with you groveling at her feet and existing for her, up on her pedestal, where she is yawning and bored. Don't do that anymore.

A woman should not be getting any financial support from you unless she is either (a) your wife, or (b) your sugar baby, and if she is (b) then do not marry her.

Any questions?

^ This, and I will add:

Women are emotional creatures, many of whom today, are totally fucked up by nonstop feminist propaganda. This woman's decision to go fuck some subhuman ghetto trash just goes to show how broken she is, and how absolutely unworthy she is of you. And if she crawled back, which she may after getting her ass beat by this thug, why would you even want to touch her?

You learned a valuable lesson, which is supposed to hurt. All of us here have had our hearts broken at some point, perhaps in different ways, but the pain is the same. YOU WILL BE OK, and not only that, you will find a woman who is BETTER than her in every way in the future. But before you meet that one, you have make sure you're fully a man who is not dependent on others to be completed. You are still very young, and there is a shit ton of fish in the sea.

Right now, take this time to focus on yourself. Pretend this girl was hit by a truck and died, and move on with your life. Get rid of anything that reminds you of her, pictures, social media, numbers etc... Of course this is easier said than done, and you will, like an addict, go back and wonder from time to time, by like all drugs, your emotions for her will wane in time, and you will let go.

Another tip is to constantly remind yourself why you broke up, instead of reminiscing on all the good times, which by the way, could have been fake for all you know if this whore was cheating even before then, always remind yourself of her fucking this subhuman ghetto trash to keep yourself away.

And you are still the man; it's not your fault this bitch was not a woman, but a little girl who needs an infinite amount of validation because she has an empty void inside. There is nothing anyone here could have done to prevent a woman like her from being the lost soul that she is.
 
Thank god you don’t have kids with her.

Never ever ever look to a woman as your equal. They are a burden from head to toe. Every one of them.

For a few short years they are beautiful and can give you children. But if they are unrestrained, as todays women are, this does not make up for the trouble they will cause you.

Read the first story in the Bible it’s clear as day. Cannot resist temptation. Can not.

Modern consumer driven society is powered by temptation. There are no restrictions or restraints placed on females whatsoever (they drive 80% of consumer spending).

If you want your own woman, someone to give you children and make your home, your going to have to learn how to restrain her yourself.

I’m not saying it’s easy, most fail. But it can be done, and it is being done. Remember she is not the enemy, the enemy truly is temptation (this is why divorce has always been less common in rural places).

If I were you I would start studying natural selection, sexual selection and Darwin’s theory of Evolution. As well as evolutionary psychology, evolutionary game theory, and practical female psychology.

Human behavior is an incredibly deep and complex subject, but once you get a couple of years under your belt, things start making more sense.

Again, thank god you aren’t married and have kids with her. You have no idea how lucky you are.
 
Thank god you don’t have kids with her.

Never ever ever look to a woman as your equal. They are a burden from head to toe. Every one of them.

For a few short years they are beautiful and can give you children. But if they are unrestrained, as todays women are, this does not make up for the trouble they will cause you.

Read the first story in the Bible it’s clear as day. Cannot resist temptation. Can not.

Modern consumer driven society is powered by temptation. There are no restrictions or restraints placed on females whatsoever (they drive 80% of consumer spending).

If you want your own woman, someone to give you children and make your home, your going to have to learn how to restrain her yourself.

I’m not saying it’s easy, most fail. But it can be done, and it is being done. Remember she is not the enemy, the enemy truly is temptation (this is why divorce has always been less common in rural places).

If I were you I would start studying natural selection, sexual selection and Darwin’s theory of Evolution. As well as evolutionary psychology, evolutionary game theory, and practical female psychology.

Human behavior is an incredibly deep and complex subject, but once you get a couple of years under your belt, things start making more sense.

Again, thank god you aren’t married and have kids with her. You have no idea how lucky you are.
Indeed, he would have lost half his shit on top of all his heart ache
 
You will look back on this some day and realize it was the best thing that ever happened to you. That day won't be tomorrow, or the next day... You'll still feel pretty shit.

Sounds like you do have yourself really well put together for your age. The only thing you were missing was getting your heart broken. It'll fade... you'll be a better person from it.
 
Bro not gonna lie, I feel bad for you, I know that feeling of a woman cheating on you.

My advice would be to try to stay true to yourself.

You said 'weekend girls aren't even fun', that doesn't sound like your character. I wouldn't start behaving that way.

I mean think about it, you might be, unknowingly, be 'the other guy' in someone else's relationship right now by acting like that on the weekends.

Not saying that's the same as what she did, don't mistake that for what I'm saying.

My point is society is completely messed up. So much revolves around sex and traditional values are being destroyed.

So don't add to that problem yourself, you sound like you're better than that. You want to be a nurse, sounds like you actually care about people. That's a good thing.

Try to find a traditional girl that will appreciate you.

Or even better: don't try to find someone, because most of the time, it happens by itself.

Just focus on yourself right now.
 
This doesn't fall on you at all man. Can almost guarentee you she'll come running back to you, the best thing you can do is continue to live your life the best you can and don't be afraid to show it. And tell her to fuck off when she does.

When I was 21 or so I had a bad feeling about the gf while I was at work. Paid a surprise visit one day when I got off early. Let myself In to find a guy lying in her bed. Thought my world was over and I'd never recover. As I'm sure you feel the same. Take joy in the fact that you know now who the loser and reacher in your relationship was. This ex of mine is now a single mom and last I heard still flipping pizzas while living at home. I went on to get a damn good job and bought my dream truck. Now with the coolest chick I've ever met. It's a bell curve, you're on the down swing right now my dude, coming from a guy who's also battled depression his whole life, you'll be on the upswing soon enough.

Go on your trip. Bring a buddy with you or some random chick. Don't let the tickets go to waste. Keeping getting huge and making that bank. Keep building you and the right chick will find her way to you.
I think it's good that you found out. Even though it is not very pleasant. But such an experience makes it unnecessary to finish on time. And the main thing is to draw the right conclusions and, as a rule, after such situations, everything becomes much better and the right people are already nearby. And of course you need to enjoy life and watch with a smile as the sun rises)))
 
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