Anyone here regret getting married and having kids?

6tren

Member
Wrong place to post I know. 30 year old here, about to be 31 soon, never married or had kids.
Mind has been thinking about getting married and starting a family ever since I turned 30.

How did you know you wanted to marry her?
Did you ever regret the marriage?
Did you ever regret having kids?
If you could have a re-do, would you make the same choices?
Have any general marriage or kid advice?
 
No regrets getting married because she will divorce you anyway at one point because she's bored or whatever (((the society))) is indoctrinating her with.

You will have 5-8 good years with her where you can prepare getting divorced and getting financially successful (need to hide though otherwise you will get robbed blank by her and big daddy gov) and then go to any 3rd or 4th world country and marry a 18 yo girl.

I did all the above.
 
You're statistically more likely to get your heart ripped out and your wallet stolen, but if this doesn't happen than it's probably worth it.

I'm kind of OCD with my approach to this though. I would want to be with the same person my whole life (not going through two or three marriages with different kids from multiple women), and I'd want my kid(s) to be financially set before having them, so I guess I'm more patient with the partner aspect after having been cheated on a few times. Makes it harder to trust people's intentions, and easier to block out potential emotional feelings.

Kind of enjoying the single scene at the moment, it's nice to mix it up when things get "boring" and at some point I'll hopefully want what you're describing OP. But I do also sleep much better at night not having any drama, bullshit arguments, cheating suspicions, any of the other bullshit that comes with it, which is great
 
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Prenuptial agreement. It mitigates a lot of risk and it communicates to both of you that you are in it for the right reasons.

If a partner has an issue with signing, then their motivation for marrying you may be off.
 
i had a novel typed out but I’ll simplify it. It’s still going to be a novel FYI

- You are NEVER ready to be a father and husband. No books or podcasts will ever prepare you for pulling a baby out of a vagina. That first $1300 daycare bill (per kid / per month) will give you a heart attack. Youre never prepared to sleep 2 hours a night for 3 months straight while working 40 hours a week (if you’re lucky and your kid actually sleeps after 3 months)

- Being single is easy and safe, but it’s not rewarding. The only people who care about your money and accolades are other superficial adults. You can keep your wall up and be selfish 24/7 but one day you’re gonna be 55 years old in an empty house. You realize you will die alone and nobody will care. Your dogs might eat your corpse because nobody will even know you kicked the bucket and you just sit in the recliner for 2 weeks until the smell scares your neighbors.

- Having a wife and kids is awesome if you don’t pick the wrong ones. A lot of guys will choose the spoiled ass rich girl with fake tits, and then be surprised when she’s a bitch who only cares about money. You can NOT think with your dick. There are girls who swallow your kids, and there are girls who raise your kids. LEARN THE DIFFERENCE. If she didn’t grow up with a father, don’t even pay attention to her. There’s so much data out there to help you pick the right woman. She might not fuck like a pornstar, but that shouldn’t be your priority when you choose the mother of your seed.

- Your kids are the ONLY people on earth who will love you no matter what if you’re a good person. They’ll even love you if you’re a piece of shit until they get older. They don’t care about your height or bank account. Your kids don’t care if you’re ugly or skinny. You are a superhero in their eyes. After the worst days of my life, nothing is better than coming home to my son wanting to play fight. You see true joy and innocence. Your kids are YOU, but you have a chance to give them the parents that you feel like you deserved.

It’s not easy and it’s not always fun. TBH I think a lot of people should not have kids. Too many people have their own unaddressed problems that will make them terrible parents. I’ve been with 100+ women and only 5 of them were wife material. It’s 2024 and the numbers are not in our favor. Don’t rush into it.

But you and your wife need to talk about: finances, religion, parenting, family, long term goals, and intimacy. A lot of guys think that a chick is wife material because she sucks dick and cooks. Then they realize that’s only a fraction of a relationship. You don’t have to agree on everything but you need to discuss it. And remember. YOU MARRY THE PERSON IN FRONT OF YOU. Not the person you “think” you can convince them to be.
 
Wrong place to post I know. 30 year old here, about to be 31 soon, never married or had kids.
Mind has been thinking about getting married and starting a family ever since I turned 30.

How did you know you wanted to marry her?
Did you ever regret the marriage?
Did you ever regret having kids?
If you could have a re-do, would you make the same choices?
Have any general marriage or kid advice?
Answered by question.
Just did.
No
No they are fucking great
Yes
Just do your best it will be fine
 
I want kids for sure, it's just
1. I don't want to the kids to grow up with divorced or parents who don't live together
2. I want to make sure the mom is good mom material (how did I figure that out?)

Finding the future mom who's ok with me being with other women is another issue because I know Ill be bored with just her.
 
Finding the future mom who's ok with me being with other women is another issue because I know I’ll be bored with just her.

This shit made me laugh so hard. You can bang a bunch of skeezers or you can settle down and start a family. Can’t have the best of both worlds brother.
 
Prenuptial agreement. It mitigates a lot of risk and it communicates to both of you that you are in it for the right reasons.

If a partner has an issue with signing, then their motivation for marrying you may be off.
Those mean nothing just FYI. If you've ever had one, you've thought it's iron clad then a $150/hr attorney rips it's apart like it's nothing. Ask anyone with money, ask anyone famous.

A prenup is a carpet term for anyone who's never used one
 
You're statistically more likely to get your heart ripped out and your wallet stolen, but if this doesn't happen than it's probably worth it.

I'm kind of OCD with my approach to this though. I would want to be with the same person my whole life (not going through two or three marriages with different kids from multiple women), and I'd want my kid(s) to be financially set before having them, so I guess I'm more patient with the partner aspect after having been cheated on a few times. Makes it harder to trust people's intentions, and easier to block out potential emotional feelings.

Kind of enjoying the single scene at the moment, it's nice to mix it up when things get "boring" and at some point I'll hopefully want what you're describing OP. But I do also sleep much better at night not having any drama, bullshit arguments, cheating suspicions, any of the other bullshit that comes with it, which is great

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVMzygtggzI
 
Ever heard of ENM?

Yes and unless you’re an extremely successful man, like top .1%, then you aren’t going to be getting any ENM with a good woman. The only guys who can attempt to do this are rich as shit and their wives can go hangout on a yacht while the husband is banging other chicks.

Even then, from a female POV, she’d be better off taking half your money in a divorce. You can sleep with all the chicks you want while she collects child support.

Lastly, that’s setting a horrible example for your children. Would you want your daughter growing up thinking that her husband is supposed to cheat on her? Do you want your son knowing that mommy wasn’t good enough for the family and he’s allowed to cheat on girls?

Kids need consistency and stability. Open relationships don’t work. They’re going to grow up very confused why their mom and dad were sleeping with multiple people.
 
There are great things about being single and great things about being with someone.

Just choose wisely enough that you don’t get yourself into a spot where you’re wishing you were single the whole time you’re in a relationship.
 
Yes and unless you’re an extremely successful man, like top .1%, then you aren’t going to be getting any ENM with a good woman. The only guys who can attempt to do this are rich as shit and their wives can go hangout on a yacht while the husband is banging other chicks.

It also works with girls from 3rd and 4th world countries. If you marry a girl from Kenya or some other African country or to lesser extent some Asian countries, you can tell her that you will have a girlfriend at the side. As long as you send the $300 monthly to her family, it will be alright.

Also, for a White dude it's pretty easy in Africa. Africa for us is what Tinder in the EU/US is for White girls. Everybody except US/EU likes White guys.
 
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