Retards in schools

[Kayz]

#2, #12, and #13 are classic.

 

[Beefster]

Dammit, that site is blocked by my employer. That's ok, people were starting to look at me funny for laughing...and that was only at this thread!

 

[Kayz]

Dammit, that site is blocked by my employer. That's ok, people were starting to look at me funny for laughing...and that was only at this thread!

Here's a sample of what you are missing right now Beefster:

12: Tard nearly ruins date
This is where I draw the fucking line. What happened to me last night was not part of the contract I signed.

I am at the grocery store with a guy I go out with sometimes. He had been studying abroad for the last year, so I was really excited to see him. We are getting beer to take to a Christmas party that we are going to, the location of which happened to be in the area of the school that I work in.

We are walking to the beer aisle, and I spot one of my tards pushing a grocery cart. He is with his mom and brother. All I want is for me to get the beer and get the hell out. I really didn't want to talk to them or subject my date to them. We make it to the beer aisle, pick up some Heinekens, and head for the checkout.

We are standing in line to pay when I hear a scream and a familiar voice yell "I love you Miss [Sped]!".

I think about turning around, but am suddenly rammed hard from behind with the shopping cart. I had to grab the conveyor belt thing to keep from barreling over. The tard then starts hugging me tightly, while screaming over and over, "I love you Miss [Sped]!" This continues for at least a full minute.

My date is dying--he is laughing so fucking hard that he is doubled over. People are staring at me and the tard that is embracing me and yelling. The checker has stopped checking and his full attention is focused on this scene. I cannot stop wondering where the fuck his mom is.

I know the solution to get him to calm down. But I am out with this amazing guy. I don't wanna do it. I really don't. But I realize the tard will not shut up and get off of me until I do...

Quietly, I start singing "The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round......."

My date is absolutely dying. Almost crying. But the tard shut the fuck up, and we got out of there, no retards attached to me.

 

[CyniQ]

I love this one.

Our principal walks in the room and asks "What is the problem?"

At this question, I can only wonder if the naked, screaming retard in the rice box is a figment of my imagination.


LMFAO. Great link Bob.

 

[hendrixsolo]

Who knows what's going through the mind of a retard. Maybe they're happy. They can't wipe their own ass without getting a fistful of shit, but maybe they just don't care. They can eat a burrito off of their forehead and nobody thinks less of them for it...isn't that bliss? Plus, retard chicks are easy and they don't care what you look like.

Maybe being a retard isn't a bad thing at all. People do for you what you don't want to or can't do for yourself. Virtually everyone around you ends up serving you.

Being a retard is like being a king.

I don't feel sorry for them, I'm actually kind of envious.

 

[hooker]

Here's something to think about:

In terms of percentages, if you meet someone who scores just slightly higher than the requirements to get into MENSA, percentage-wise, you are actually closer to a "retard" Inot my first choice of terms, but the one used in this thread) than you are to that person.

Doctors and lawyers, by the way, are typically only 10% more intellegent than the general population. MENSA requires 2 standard deviations above average or, 32% more intellegent than the general population.

 

[Bigkarch]

so...are you saying Hook..that you, a member of Mensa, 32 % more intelligent, than me a criminal defense lawyer from Stanford Un....not a member of Mensa..but IMO intelligent with test taking and IMO means shit...wisdom is number one..percentage means shit......lets take a Mensa member who is so intelligent in test, theories, news events, trivia and get busted for some dumb ass shit in the real world...does that Mensa member know about arraingments and lawyer priviledges....the 6th amendment, Miranda Vs Arizona....search and seizure laws....fruits of the tainted tree....sure he can quote scientic theories and studies..but that dont mean shit....Mensa and intelligence dont mean shit to me Hook...You Know that...to me it is all about character and integrity and wisdom.....and maturity...Hell, Hitlers right hand men had PHD's and could rule Mensa with their mentallity and intelligence..but what did that get them...Mensa and intelligence means shit to me....just a group of smart people who think they are better than us....I am intelligent and can go on with my academics with Stanford, my bar, criminal defense , studies, even combined with Berkerly....and worked with the most notorious criminal defense laywer (alive)..lets talk OJ.....but that dont mean shit....character and ingetrity is number one unless you are money hungry, care more about your reputation than life, and am immature..

 

[Bigkarch]

so all in all...it just rest with sound reasoning...