CRITICAL anabolics (UK UGL)

[Sean Critical]

Hi, there's a poll running for 'The Best UGL 2026' so if you think that's us then we'd really appreciate your vote.

THE BEST UGL 2026

The Best UGL 2026 It’s been a long time since we last ran one of these. Our previous Most Popular UGL poll dates all the way back to 2022, and in truth, the underground scene has changed beyond rec…

uglnewsletter.com

Thank you
Critical team

 

[Sean Critical]

Critical Anabolics International

(Coming 28/01/2026)

From day one our main goals were
To replicate the high standards of customer service that CRITICAL have become known for.
To implement a security‑focused strategic approach, so that success rates remain high even in countries that are known to be strict or difficult to ship to.
Here at Critical, we're all about delivering exceptional service and available products to every single one of our customers. Because of that, we’ve worked extremely closely on this project, refining every detail. The result is something we’re really proud of — bringing Critical Anabolics to the international community. Not just the products, but the full community experience, including testing, support, and the same fun, chaos, and energy our UK members love.

Shipping and Sales

We have brought on board an international shipper with over 15 years of experience shipping worldwide. Dean Critical is highly experienced in shipping routes across most of the globe. He also has many years of experience in sales, so it was a no‑brainer to bring him onto this project.

International Telegram Group

The international Telegram group is now taking invites and is exclusively for international customers. These groups are intended to provide transparency, shared experiences, and open communication. This will be managed by myself, Dean, and our Critical administrators. All updates will be posted here.

Critical Updates Channel

Full access to the Critical Updates channel, where product drops, release dates, and key announcements are posted regularly. Several exciting releases are planned early this year; some are already out now.

The Gym Lab Access

If you are a paying customer, you will get access to the Gym Lab. The Gym Lab is a free service offered to all Critical customers. The service is run by a doctor with over 15 years of experience in blood work. He performs blood analysis to help people who are new to this or anyone who has an issue they can’t solve.

Each month, one customer is selected to receive free blood work and a full analysis, funded by us.

Product Testing (Janoshik.com)

You will receive the same testing support as UK customers. One product per person per batch may be submitted to Janoshik.com. Provided it is properly documented, the vial will be replaced and the test cost reimbursed via store credit.

QR‑Code Batch Verification

QR codes will soon be introduced to identify product batch numbers and purity. There is an established acceptable tolerance for dosing, acknowledging the realities of working with different raw‑material batches. If a product tests below the acceptable range, pricing will be adjusted accordingly. Full details have already been shared in a post by Tommy.

Full Product‑Range Access

Full access to all Critical Anabolics products, including pre‑workout compounds, oral products, and all future releases. Everything available will be on the new dedicated encrypted service. You will also be included in new product testing, which will see reduced pricing in exchange for product feedback.

Critical Care Products

The full Critical Care range will be available at launch. These support medications are produced by Critical and tested by Janoshik, consistent with our quality standards.

Critical BioTech (Coming Soon)

Critical BioTech will launch shortly with approximately 30 peptides and plans for future blends. This range will not be available internationally at launch; however, we aim to roll it out approximately four to eight weeks later. Updates will be provided.

The reason is that we want to roll out in stages to ensure each stage meets the highest standards.

The Body Edit

The Body Edit will be fully relaunched, and a new pen, Omimorph, will be added to the collection. It will operate via its own website and will also be available internationally after the Critical BioTech rollout on our new encrypted service.

Customer Support

Full customer support will be provided directly by Dean Critical and myself.

Shipping

Free stealth packaging, including internal packaging. Specific details will not be discussed publicly for security reasons.

Optional Reship Insurance

Optional reship insurance will be offered for a small percentage of the order total. This insurance covers orders of any size. In the event of a confirmed loss or seizure, a replacement will be sent at no additional cost.

Shipping Coverage

We will ship to most countries right out of the gate, but there are some that will be limited.

Thanks for reading. If you have any questions, please ask or email me directly.

Sean_Critical@proton.me

Regards,

Sean Critical
Critical Anabolics

 

[Faipdeooiad]

Doing free bloods for someone once a month is mega

 

[Sean Critical]

Hi all,

So the Body Edit relaunch fully is complete. It’s taken a while because we have had a brand-new custom website built only for our Body Edit range.

The reason is that we wanted to make it more friendly to people who are not in the “ugl” scene but can benefit from prices that are a lot cheaper than big pharma for the same exact product. It’s also much more friendly to anyone’s family and friends.

We also have Omnimorph, the retatrutide and cagrilintide pen. The power of retatrutide with added food‑noise suppression from the cagrilintite. It’s getting amazing reviews at the moment, and refills for it will soon follow. You can mix and match any refills you want with our pens.

Along with the website, we are launching smart, sleek digital business cards that you can send to anyone on WhatsApp and Telegram. These cards will give a link to the body edit website and look very professional.

We are also changing the pen boxes to a single box that contains everything you need. The QR codes will soon work with full instructions, a FAQ, and demonstration videos on how to use the pens and refills.

But we’re not finished yet—we are also offering affiliate applications for this site. You will receive your own custom business card with your code on it and incentives for your customers to actually use the code. You can apply for this via my email.

If you would like a digital business card—or just a regular link to the new website—please email me at:

sean_critical@proton.me.

Kind regards
The Critical Team

 

[dasistmane]

Have you stopped reimbursing third party testing?

 

[Sean Critical]

Have you stopped reimbursing third party testing?

Yes we are working on a much better system. I'll post it up in here as it give a full explanation as to why..

 

[Sean Critical]

Hi everyone, I just want to clear up the testing going forward with Critical Anabolics.

In the beginning, we wanted to be as transparent as possible, so we offered customers the option to test any product. We would pay for the test, and the customer would have the vial replaced.

There were two reasons for this. First, it showed that we are fully transparent and confident that all our products are to a high standard, otherwise we wouldn’t offer this service. Second, we can do all the testing we want, but a customer test will always hit harder.

The issue was that the only product being tested by customers was Primo, while the other products were left out. We were still testing everything, but also paying for Primo tests over and over again.

So now we are changing this, as you can agree it’s just not a good system. We are introducing QR code batch testing, where each batch of raws will be tested and linked to the specific batch, including the mg/ml. If someone would like to further test a product, they are welcome to do so, but it would be at their own expense, as we feel we have done enough to prove we are a trustworthy lab.

We feel this is a much better system, as we can continue to show that we test everything. If people still doubt us, they are free to test it themselves. As the lab grows, we will always change things we feel aren’t working as well as intended. Anyone in our telegram will agree we are kind of sick of Primo test Janoshik reports.

This will be rolled out over the coming weeks, as it’s quite a big change to implement.

Kind regards,
Critical Team

 

[dasistmane]

How is that a much better system? You're just being greedy. You really had a good thing going what a shame.

 

[Sean Critical]

How is that a much better system? You're just being greedy. You really had a good thing going what a shame.

With all due respect, we are not prepared to keep paying for the same Primo test over and over again. I don’t see why we should waste money on testing a batch of raws 20 times because one individual doubts us.

So we are going to spend the money on all our products and have a QR system that will be on every product, not just Primo.

The fact that you’re calling us tight is ridiculous, as we spend more money on testing than any other lab. Our labels and boxes cost a fortune, and we buy high-quality raws no matter the cost. Everything we use is high quality.

We pay for free blood work for our customers, we do discounts, and we do trials at a reduced cost for anyone.

Your comment is ridiculous, as our new QR system has already cost us a lot of money and will benefit everyone on every product, not just Primo.

If you’re not happy with it, you’re free to use another lab, but we feel this is better for our customers and we have had good feedback about it.

 

[dasistmane]

.

 

[dasistmane]

we spend more money on testing than any other lab

How did you figure this one out? Source?

No one cares about fancy labels or boxes or a QR code system.

We're not stupid over here. This isn't your telegram channel full of simps. Third party testing reimbursement is a must.

 

[Sean Critical]

How did you figure this one out? Source?

No one cares about fancy labels or boxes or a QR code system.

We're not stupid over here. This isn't your telegram channel full of simps. Third party testing reimbursement is a must.

Think your on your own there I can barely keep up with the emails from meso lads but carry on hating your making yourself look silly.

 

[Vitamin T]

How did you figure this one out? Source?

No one cares about fancy labels or boxes or a QR code system.

We're not stupid over here. This isn't your telegram channel full of simps. Third party testing reimbursement is a must.

Mate, you’re just looking like a troll at this point. I really don’t get your problem.

I personally think that the QR system is a great idea. It allows the end user to see the purity levels & the dosing of that particular batch.

The UGL scene is cut throat, especially with the forums we have today. A few bad reviews can be catastrophic for a lab, so do you really think a lab that has a solid reputation right now, would do anything to risk their reputation? I don’t think so.

You have a choice, you can be a customer, or you can use another lab. Obviously, you have an opinion, but I don’t think you really need to let your e2 run wild on here mate.

 

[dasistmane]

Mate, you’re just looking like a troll at this point. I really don’t get your problem.

I personally think that the QR system is a great idea. It allows the end user to see the purity levels & the dosing of that particular batch.

The UGL scene is cut throat, especially with the forums we have today. A few bad reviews can be catastrophic for a lab, so do you really think a lab that has a solid reputation right now, would do anything to risk their reputation? I don’t think so.

You have a choice, you can be a customer, or you can use another lab. Obviously, you have an opinion, but I don’t think you really need to let your e2 run wild on here mate.

How does stopping the reimbursement of third party testing directly benefit the end user?

 

[Vitamin T]

How does stopping the reimbursement of third party testing directly benefit the end user?

What benefits the end user is good gear & good customer service, which is what critical are doing.

They’re not discouraging you to send stuff away for testing, but from what I’ve read from Sean in this thread, it’s the same stuff that’s being tested over & over again from the same batch - primo by the looks of it.

Honestly, how many times have you sent a critical product away for testing?

 

[Sean Critical]

What benefits the end user is good gear & good customer service, which is what critical are doing.

They’re not discouraging you to send stuff away for testing, but from what I’ve read from Sean in this thread, it’s the same stuff that’s being tested over & over again from the same batch - primo by the looks of it.

Honestly, how many times have you sent a critical product away for testing?

Says he’s not stupid but moans about a service he’s never used? Also, he’s the spokesman for the meso community now?

And the “no one cares about fancy boxes” comment is laughable, as our customers love the packaging. I can’t tell you how many compliments we have had on it. Company's spend millions on packaging products. Wonder how much Christian Dior pay Johnny Depp a year ? Not saying we are Dior but you get my point.

Don’t get me wrong, we want feedback and people’s opinions on changes we make, but I feel this guy has an agenda. Maybe kicked from Telegram most likely.

The response from the meso community has been really good, and I try to answer all the emails from everyone on here a few times a day. There are some idiots on Telegram, and I think most people know that — I just remove them.

The meso lads I get in are actually so easy to deal with. They just want a website link, and most are not even interested in Telegram, or they just use our Telegram for updates and don't get involved. Even when ordering, they send exactly what they need — they don’t pester for tracking.

I’m all for constructive criticism if anyone has any. We make changes all the time or introduce new products to keep it fresh. That’s what we do at Critical, and we have done okay so far

 

[PsychedUp]

There have been countless sources on here who have been mercilessly berated in order to get them to reimburse for third party testing. This is the first time I've seen a source who initially reimbursed third party testing then rescind on that promise.

You said it yourself - 'we can do all the testing we want, but a customer test will always hit harder.' It also invokes a certain level of trust and good faith. Here on Meso, reimbursent for third party testing is inviolable.

Third party testing isn't totally infallible, I know. But neither is your QR code system. Hypothetically, how can you guarantee that that particular vial is from the batch that corresponds to the test results from that particular QR codes? You can't.

Is reimbursing all these Primo third party tests really putting that severe of a dent in your bottom line? Most people don't test. But knowing you're a UGL that reimburses those tests does give added confidence.

I'm not trying to shit on Critical, but just giving my two cents.

@Sampei sorry for calling you into this. But are @dasistmane and myself really being unreasonable here?

 

[Missingintheabyss]

Paying out over and over 40 times for primo testing then pulling any refunding for future third party testing, even once per batch of anything else, seems strange

 

[Sean Critical]

There have been countless sources on here who have been mercilessly berated in order to get them to reimburse for third party testing. This is the first time I've seen a source who initially reimbursed third party testing then rescind on that promise.

You said it yourself - 'we can do all the testing we want, but a customer test will always hit harder.' It also invokes a certain level of trust and good faith. Here on Meso, reimbursent for third party testing is inviolable.

Third party testing isn't totally infallible, I know. But neither is your QR code system. Hypothetically, how can you guarantee that that particular vial is from the batch that corresponds to the test results from that particular QR codes? You can't.

Is reimbursing all these Primo third party tests really putting that severe of a dent in your bottom line? Most people don't test. But knowing you're a UGL that reimburses those tests does give added confidence.

I'm not trying to shit on Critical, but just giving my two cents.

@Sampei sorry for calling you into this. But are @dasistmane and myself really being unreasonable here?

There have been countless sources on here who have been mercilessly berated in order to get them to reimburse for third party testing. This is the first time I've seen a source who initially reimbursed third party testing then rescind on that promise.

You said it yourself - 'we can do all the testing we want, but a customer test will always hit harder.' It also invokes a certain level of trust and good faith. Here on Meso, reimbursent for third party testing is inviolable.

Third party testing isn't totally infallible, I know. But neither is your QR code system. Hypothetically, how can you guarantee that that particular vial is from the batch that corresponds to the test results from that particular QR codes? You can't.

Is reimbursing all these Primo third party tests really putting that severe of a dent in your bottom line? Most people don't test. But knowing you're a UGL that reimburses those tests does give added confidence.

I'm not trying to shit on Critical, but just giving my two cents.

@Sampei sorry for calling you into this. But are @dasistmane and myself really being unreasonable here?

The problem is as I’ve explained above. People aren’t even using the offer. We had one vial of test cyp that we paid for a few months ago, and the rest are primo tests only. If people would test a variety of the products, then it wouldn’t be an issue, but they’re not doing that.

We’re not saying don’t test the products; we’re saying that we’re going to test everything, add a QR code for that batch, and if you want to test it further, then you’re welcome to do so. Nobody wants to see primo tests over and over every time someone thinks it’s fake.

It’s got nothing to do with the money. We spend thousands on testing raws and products. Also, when we get a bad raw that comes back not up to par, it goes straight down the toilet. It’s quite tough out there still, and we lose a lot of money on poor-quality raws. That’s just how it is now.

We do more testing than anyone else and are going to continue to do so. But this system just isn’t working as intended. It’s that simple—it has nothing to do with saving money it's more hassle to add these qr codes to every vile than to chuck money at primo tests. Everyone is always moaning about the Jano tests, asking how we know they’re from the batch you tested. So now you’ll know exactly what batch it’s come from.

We’re never going to please everyone, but I appreciate your comment and your opinion on it. Maybe give the system a chance.

 

[Missingintheabyss]

The problem is as I’ve explained above. People aren’t even using the offer. We had one vial of test cyp that we paid for a few months ago, and the rest are primo tests only. If people would test a variety of the products, then it wouldn’t be an issue, but they’re not doing that.

Hi mate. Genuinely a big Critical fan.

I did recently reach out about getting a product tested and was told it wouldn't be covered because it had already been tested once (the mast e). I couldn't find the result posted anywhere though.