thick
New Member
a few good ones.> >
> > 1. Constipated People Don't Give A S**t.
> >
> > 2. Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself.
> >
> > 3. I Have The Body Of A God.....Buddha
> >
> > 4. Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?
> >
> > 5. If You Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.
> >
> > 6. Please Tell Your Pants Its Not Polite To Point.
> >
> > 7. If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A
> > Little Better.
> >
> > 8. My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.
> >
> > 9. To All You Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
> >
> > 10. If At First You Don't Succeed...Blame Someone Else And
> > Seek Counseling.
> >
> > 11. Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings".
> >
> > 12. If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.
> >
> > 13. Horn Broken... Watch For Finger.
> >
> > 14. It's Not How You Pick Your Nose, But Where You Put The
> > Booger.
> >
> > 15. If You're Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass.
> >
> > 16. You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To
> > Me
> >
> > 17. The Earth Is Full - Go Home
> >
> > 18. If You Drink Don't Park, Accidents Cause People.
> >
> > 19. This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To
> > Me
> >
> > 20. Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult
> >
> > 21. If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?
> >
> > 22. The Face Is Familiar But I Can't Quite Remember My Name
> >
> > 23. Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway
> >
> > 24. Illiterate? Write For Help
> >
> > 25. Honk If Anything Falls Off
> >
> > 26. Cover Me I'm Changing Lanes
> >
> > 27. He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From The
> > Next Exit
> >
> > 28. You! Out Of The Gene Pool!
> >
> > 29. I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To
> >
> > 30. Where Are We Going And Why Am I In This Hand basket?
> >
> > 31. If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It
> > Wrong...
> >
> > 32. If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over. [Seen
> > Upside Down, On A Jeep]
> >
> > 33. Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35mph Are Also
> > Timed For 70 mph.
> >
> > 34. Guys: No Shirt, No Service. Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
> > [Reported To Be Seen On A Restaurant]
> >
> > 35. If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman
> > Look Like Jabba The Hut?
> >
> > 36. Necrophilia: That Uncontrollable Urge To Crack Open A
> > Cold One.
> >
> > 37. Ax Me About Ebonics
> >
> > 38. Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel
> >
> > 39. Boldly Going Nowhere
> >
> > 40. Cat: The Other White Meat
> >
> > 41. Caution - Driver Legally Blonde!
> >
> > 42. Don't Be Sexist - Broads Hate That
> >
> > 43. Heart Attacks... God's Revenge For Eating His Animal
> > Friends
> >
> > 44. How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits
> > He Is Lost?
> >
> > 45. Money Isn't Everything, But It Sure Keeps The Kids In
> > Touch
> >
> > 46. Saw It... Wanted It... Had A Fit... Got It!
> >
> > 47. My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom.
> >
> > 48. GROW YOUR OWN DOPE --- PLANT A MAN.
> >
> > 49. All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets.
> >
> > 50. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
> >
> > 51. WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
> >
> > 52. BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
> >
> > 53. So you're a feminist...Isn't that precious.
> >
> > 54. I need someone really bad...Are you really bad?
> >
> > 1. Constipated People Don't Give A S**t.
> >
> > 2. Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself.
> >
> > 3. I Have The Body Of A God.....Buddha
> >
> > 4. Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?
> >
> > 5. If You Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.
> >
> > 6. Please Tell Your Pants Its Not Polite To Point.
> >
> > 7. If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A
> > Little Better.
> >
> > 8. My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.
> >
> > 9. To All You Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
> >
> > 10. If At First You Don't Succeed...Blame Someone Else And
> > Seek Counseling.
> >
> > 11. Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings".
> >
> > 12. If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.
> >
> > 13. Horn Broken... Watch For Finger.
> >
> > 14. It's Not How You Pick Your Nose, But Where You Put The
> > Booger.
> >
> > 15. If You're Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass.
> >
> > 16. You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To
> > Me
> >
> > 17. The Earth Is Full - Go Home
> >
> > 18. If You Drink Don't Park, Accidents Cause People.
> >
> > 19. This Would Be Really Funny If It Weren't Happening To
> > Me
> >
> > 20. Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult
> >
> > 21. If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?
> >
> > 22. The Face Is Familiar But I Can't Quite Remember My Name
> >
> > 23. Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway
> >
> > 24. Illiterate? Write For Help
> >
> > 25. Honk If Anything Falls Off
> >
> > 26. Cover Me I'm Changing Lanes
> >
> > 27. He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From The
> > Next Exit
> >
> > 28. You! Out Of The Gene Pool!
> >
> > 29. I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To
> >
> > 30. Where Are We Going And Why Am I In This Hand basket?
> >
> > 31. If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It
> > Wrong...
> >
> > 32. If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over. [Seen
> > Upside Down, On A Jeep]
> >
> > 33. Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35mph Are Also
> > Timed For 70 mph.
> >
> > 34. Guys: No Shirt, No Service. Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
> > [Reported To Be Seen On A Restaurant]
> >
> > 35. If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman
> > Look Like Jabba The Hut?
> >
> > 36. Necrophilia: That Uncontrollable Urge To Crack Open A
> > Cold One.
> >
> > 37. Ax Me About Ebonics
> >
> > 38. Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel
> >
> > 39. Boldly Going Nowhere
> >
> > 40. Cat: The Other White Meat
> >
> > 41. Caution - Driver Legally Blonde!
> >
> > 42. Don't Be Sexist - Broads Hate That
> >
> > 43. Heart Attacks... God's Revenge For Eating His Animal
> > Friends
> >
> > 44. How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits
> > He Is Lost?
> >
> > 45. Money Isn't Everything, But It Sure Keeps The Kids In
> > Touch
> >
> > 46. Saw It... Wanted It... Had A Fit... Got It!
> >
> > 47. My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom.
> >
> > 48. GROW YOUR OWN DOPE --- PLANT A MAN.
> >
> > 49. All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets.
> >
> > 50. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
> >
> > 51. WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
> >
> > 52. BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.
> >
> > 53. So you're a feminist...Isn't that precious.
> >
> > 54. I need someone really bad...Are you really bad?
> >
